To the Women of Chicago:

ok so summer is almost here, and the weather has definitely given us a taste of what's to come.  it was smoldering hot the last couple of days and yes, it is hot, but ladies, PLEASE COVER YOUR ROLLS.  i'm sorry to be so blunt, but just because its 80 degrees, doesn't give you the right to let your belly hang out of your shits and your butt cheeks out of your shorts.  it is hot, but not that hot that you can't cover an extra 3 inches of skin. 

yesterday, i was walking home from work and saw a decent sized woman walking in front of me in the smallest jean shorts i've ever seen.  they wouldn't have fit a 5 yr old and some how she squeezed her legs and ass into those things and buttoned them up.  i was amazed and also threw up from the cellulite coming from the back.  girl, get some bigger shorts.  you'll be able to walk easier and sit easier...plus what happens if you go to the bathroom and can't get the zipper back up?  IT GETS WORSE.  i caught up with her at a red light and sure enough the girl has no bra on.  ok i was blessed (only in this scenario) with small boobs and can most of the time get away without wearing a bra, but this girl, omg she had torpedoes and nothing to support them.  it was so bad, not tasteful and not good looking. yes, boobs are hot and blah blah but no man in their right sense would have those this chick was hot. 

i'm afraid to go to the beach this weekend because i'm sure there are going to be a lot of itty bitty bikinis everywhere on some not so itty bitty bodies.  wear a moo moo or a pair or shorts that fit you, ladies, please i'm begging.

i'll be there in bball shorts and a tshirt just so that i don't gross anyone out.

Caught Comando

i probably shouldnt tell you guys this but its funny enough and i apparently have no shame so here it goes:

ok well, i had an interview today in oak brook. alex told me it would be a 2 hour drive so being a weirdo, i decided to drive there in a pair of shorts so that i wouldn't wrinkle my pants. soooooo i pulled over in an empty parking lot to switch into pants and tuck my shirt in and so on. WELL, i had no undies on!!!!!!! the shorts that i was wearing have the built in underwear (running shorts have those) so i apparently didn't realize it until i had to wear pants that didn't have built in undies!!! i was mortified and thought, welp this should be fun. everytime i had to stand up, i was so embarassed. it was awful.

of all the things that i prepared for and all the time i spent picking out my outfit, i never in a bazillion years thought that i would be interviewing comando. shoot me now.

HAHAHA i am the most embarassing person ever. ugh. laugh at me all you want, but make this a lesson to you : always wear underwear!

 

Cute Old People

Soooooo bored today but i realized that old people are cute.  i'm on my 1,150th prospect into an excel spreadshit and have seen some funny names (byrd and kittie) , saw that there is a "keppler" road in IL and have realized that a lot of the older generation share email addresses:
- thejohnsonfam@hotmail
- kandkhansen@gmail
- mikeandjenna@sbcglobal
- and so on...

how cute are they?  they are clearly not sending dirty emails to their mistresses/pool boys and are comfortable enough to have all emails be seen by the other.  granted, my parents don't have a communal email address but my mom does look at all of my dads at one time or another because he can't figure out gmail. hahahah.  and whats the difference, if your bank account is shared and your cell phones are on the same bill, shouldn't you be able to figure out by one of those if anything sketchy is going on?   i think its cute...would i ever share with my guy?  sure, i'd want him to share with me but not the other way around.  i shop way too much online and would get judged for all the shopping websites that email me, talk wayyyy to much with my girl friends, and i'd have to tell my side boyfriend not to email me anymore, jk jk.  i'm not sure if i would share an address...maybe in the future when i have kids and am getting emails about parent/teacher conferences and when/where basketball practice is so that i can make my guy do the carpooling. 

maybe there will be a kaitlynnandXXXXX@gmail ?!??! HA barf.

Class of 2009

Marquette graduation is this weekend and i'm feeling a little sad that sunday marks the 1 yr anniversary of the Class of 2009's graduation.  i had a great time at graduation sitting with my girlies from the school of business...however, my body was not happy AT ALL.  i was sunburned from the baseball game, chubby bc of how much beer and fast food i consumed, and a little bit hungover from downing drinks to make dinner a little bit easier with the stratmans and koepplers together.   all in all, i loved senior year and everything that came with it.

i dont know if you know me very well, but i was a bit of a tool until the middle of junior year and didn't really like marquette/milwaukee/life and i am SO HAPPY that i finally became a human and had a life!  i was such a loser that nobody even remembers me before junior year, how sad is that?  kind of ok though bc i had awful blonde hair and about 30 lbs extra in mid section ( "you were a bit chubby" -direct quote from judes).  i'm going to get a little bit sappy here and say a couple of thanks to those people who made marquette and the last 2 years of school a blast:

-kim:  from the first time we told eachother our life stories in mccormic to waking up in my bed after the infamous nap on the 4th of july not knowing how we got there, to sharing clothes, to operation KK and ALL of our emails, thanks for being my first friend. awww.
-montron:  thanks for being there every thurs/fri/saturday with a case of bud light and a pizza to start the night off, "dude, i just did something really bad...me too" i'll never be able to drink skol vodka again

-wendy:  thanks for giving me strep throat 2 times and thanks for letting me lay on your bed and chat a bazillion times.  i don't know if anyone else cries at the lion king because they are so happy for them but us two!

-cathy:  thank  god we made it through 1st semester of junior yr and put those days behind us!  i'm glad we were little partners in crime senior year, i'm pretty sure that every fri consisted of me asking you if you made it to work, sat consisted of the question if we were still alive and sun if anyone wanted chinese...i'm glad things still haven't changed :D 

-becca:  although your cough was pretty sick, i'm glad that i shared a bed with you during SB09.  i will never forget walking into murphys after my last final and seeing you at the end of the bar with your shades on bawling to "graduation"  i'm so happy that we are fweinds and can't wait to have you live here :D

obivously i dont want to leave out ashton, alanna, clare, michela and katrina.  thank you girls for having faith in me...i wasn't just the girl that lived with kim!  from crashing on ashton/alanna's floor on sundays during movie day, to michela's xmas card, to the XXX birthday that had everyone in tears, to katrina and i surviving dance class at the y.  you guys seriously made me enjoy the last 2 years at marquette and every night of the year "so college"

Spending Budget

this is the first time in my life that i am putting myself on a store list and budget for a shopping spree.  i neeeeed new business casual because i look like a child in my suit that i got when i was fat.  HOWEVER, i cannot bring myself to spend a hundo on a pair of pants.  i'm heading up to the pleasant prairie, sconnie outlets to do some damage.  too bad i'm limiting myself to stores with no fun clothes in them.  boo. 

this is the look i'm going for...hahaha

THE LION KING

I almost started to get happy tears on the train to work today...why?? because i was reading the redeye and sure enough there was a full page ad for the lion king coming back to chicago!!!!  its been 5 years since its been here and boy am i excited!!!!  the lion king is my 2nd favorite movie of all time (behind the little mermaid) and i'm so obsessed with nahla that i was a little jealous that halle berry named her daughter nahla before i could.  my best friends, alex and jenna, and i would play the lion king and run around on all fours.  of course, i was always nahla.  i can still probably recite the movie word for word.  HOWEVER, i went to watch in a couple of months ago and it wasn't in my dvd case.  which one of you stole my lion king dvd!?!

i did some searching on line for tickets and i can't decide which ones i want to get.  i saw wicked and we were too close to see the whole set and i feel like you have to be able to see EVERYTHING for the lion king.  i'm thinking maybe like the first couple rows in the balcony???  oh gosh i cannot wait.  i'm gonna be a mighty king, so enemies beware!  hoooooooorayyyy.

HERE'S the LINK if you want to buy me tickets :D

ok so yesterday wasn't that bad...

i got a call back for a 2nd interview, so MAYBE yesterday wasn't all that bad.  hehehe.

today is tuesday.

This monday is going down in history for worst monday...everrr

well today, may 17th 2010, is the worst monday i've ever had.  why?  because it just SUCKS.  actually because i scheduled an interview for monday morning.  that is the dumbest thing to do, don't do it. everrr.

it started when i woke up, i got up at 3:31 am.  why?  idk.  so i fell back asleep until 7:30 and woke up with the worst sore neck/ribs/back ever.  it feels like i slept on 807 peas and trust me, i am no princess.  sick. 
fast forward to 10 oclock, i decided to drive to the el because of the rain and because of my errands for after work.  too bad today is one of those stupid street cleaning days so everybody that normally parks by the el only had 1 side of the street to park on!  i didn't have enough time to go back home and walk so i just drove around for 10 minutes until i found a spot.  gah.
finally time for my interview,  well it was in the olympia centre on michigan ave and chicago = intense.  i had to change my shoes in the elevator and fix myself up from the 5 block walk all by the time i got to to the 17th floor.  did i mention that i shared the elevator for 14 of those floors so that means i really only had 3 to get myself together.  ahhh.
then the interview started off well, i was in a conference room that over looked water tower place and i felt like pretty cool shit.  however, didn't realize that i'd be interviewing with 3 different people.  yikes, let the shit show begin.  the first guy was fine, talked about all that random crap and then moved onto his boss = my boss.  he was so dry that it was awfully hard to make conversation with him.  ugh. THENNNN the kicker, that final person was a very harsh female.  she was one of those power tripping, tall, successful blonde that kind of reminded me of a man.  she had such an overwhelming personality and voice that it just dominated the entire room.  she went off about all this nonsense and pretty much questioned and chewed me out like a drill Sargent.  i was counting down the minutes until she let me out of that room.  right as i was leaving, she leans in and goes "you better send thank you cards right away"  no crap, does she think that i'm stupid?  ugh.  my self esteem is in the pooper.

there is no way that i will get this job, nor did i spend all that much time preparing but you know what?  it ruined my day.  monday's already start off crappy and to start it off at an interview that will go no where....even worse. 

kk has a case of the mondays....really bad.  i need a hug and a huge glass of wine (cue office space when michael bolton attacks the copier)

Don't think rationally.

just my thoughts of today:  not everything needs to be rationalized.  i mean come on, sometimes there has to be some feelings behind actions not carefully thought out actions.  they will lead you to a very boring and lonely life if you never act on how you feel.

don't over analyze EVERYTHING.  

Becca is coming to Chicago

well, my bff 4 life, becca volk, is finally moving to chicago.  back in october we both made it our goal to move to the windy city.  mine was to do it asap and becca's was to be here by june 1st.  i got lucky and had the chance to move in december and have been anxiously awaiting becca's journey to chicago. 

finally got the news on sunday night that she would be moving in 3 short weeks!  YAY.  cathy and i have been apartment shopping for her and can't wait to help her move in!  summer 2010 in the city of chicago!!!!  waahhooooo.

Hopeless Romantic

thanks to cathy and her movies, i've become a little sappy.  i think that my black heart has been replaced with a mushy, lovey-dovey heart.  not the right timing for me to be a lush and a hopeless romantic but i can't help it.  more and more i've been wishing that i could fast forward to 2012-2014 and be in my late twenties so i can bypass all of this dating bullshit of the early twenties.  it sucks.  my friends are constantly trying to find the right guy, wondering if he'll call, wondering if he's gchatting to some slu online, stalking facebook for pics and so on.  i don't want to do that, one bit.  i just want to be 26, have a constant roommate (so i can stop moving!), someone to come home to, someone to make dinner, do their laundy, and someone to sleep next to for the rest of my life.  BUT instead, i'm almost 23 years old, and in a relationship that one of us likes being an the early twenties, and one of us hates it.  guess which one i am?

i need to stop watching movies where the guy chases after the girl...since when does that actually happen? ugh today is a horrible day and i'm sick of being the head-over-heels-in-love girl to a guy that couldn't care less if he watches the hawks game with or without me.

these are the stupid movies that makes me think that i'll get a knock on my door at 10 tonight and it will be him telling me he loves me too....
-when harry met sally
-definitely maybe
-the notebook (i want a noah)
-he's just not that into you (ben affleck chasing jennifer and mac guy chasing gigi)
-whatever i'm sick of this list

i'm sticking to action movies and documentaries from now on.  here's to my black heart coming back. NO MORE crying bc no man will ever chase after me and tell me that the wants to spend the rest of his life with me, and he wants the rest of his life to start as soon as possible.

Judes is THE Best Mom

Here are some insights to my mom:  Judith Anne Koeppler.

-we call her Judes, she signs her emails as "Judes/Mom"
-she is 5'4", weighs nothing and looks super tiny
-she has sent me inspirational emails since i left home, she even once quoted neil young
-she loves my dad soooo much even though he snores, doesn't clean up and watches waaaay too much baseball
-she hates to bake but she will on christmas
-she makes THE BEST CHEESY POTS EVER.  ugh i love them
-she went to school for fashion design and economics...and designed children's clothes for Oshkosh B'Gosh
-she loves gardening and pulling weeds
-she has the best handwriting i've ever seen
-one of her feet is bigger than the other (same with meeee)
-she has a facebook and regularly comments on my wall
-she owned a successful art gallery
-she used to drive a woody station wagon
-she is a sconnie
-the list could go on and on but most importantly she is my mom :D

i had a really great time with her this weekend and wish that my parents weren't 3 hours away :(

In a summer mood

i have summer sandals on today and its sunny and i'm not wearing black = i'm in the mood for it to be 85 degrees!  however, i need it to be like 70 when i walk to work at 9am and 70 when i leave at 4pm so that i don't come into work/home drenched bc its hotter than shit outside.

on the way to work today, some bum told me that he liked my hair, i gave up my seat for a lady with a kid AND i had a great song come on my ipod right as i got off the train.  it was a good 20 minutes!  i decided that i was going to listen to another summer-esque song and i immediately went to find kenny chesney, summertime.  too bad i didn't have it on my ipod!  boo, so i settled for some beyonce and went on my way.  it got me to thinking that when i get home, i'm going to put together a summer playlist that gets me in the mood.  i can't wait until cathy and i can sit outside and enjoy the 85 degree weather, whenever it gets here.  please come now, please come now.

Playlist includes:
1. summertime - the ches  (bare feet on the dashboard = summer)
2. cold december - matt nathanson ( its been a cold december, not anymore!)
3. three little birds - bob marley  (Singin' sweet songs of melodies pure and true!!!)
4. telephone - lady gags and honey b  (Tonight I'm not takin' no calls, 'Cause I'll be dancin' = yes)
5. empire state of mind- jay z
6. umbrella - rihanna (circa 2008)
7. jai ho - no idea + the pussycat dolls
8. never know - jack johnson (probably like 10 more songs of his too)
9. so paid - akon (ted's favorite song)
10. told you so - keith urban  (dancing in the living room at 4 am with michela, ha)

apparently some chick for associatedcontent.com thinks she has the top 25 songs for summer 2010 but i beg to differ lady.  c'mon!  girl that thinks she knows everything...

The Dreaded Ex-boyfriends

What do guys do with the momentums from relationships? my guess is that guys don't think twice about keeping stuff their ex-gfs gave them?  no sentimental value in the tshirt she gave you, its still a shirt and you feel nothing towards keeping the shirt.  you can throw out all the cards/letters/pictures/knick knacks that she gave you.  no harm done, you just know that when you have a new girlfriend, you switch out the shirt or make sure you never tell your current gf, that your old gf gave that to you and you're done.  relationship over and out.

on the other hand, for girls, the situation is a little different.  girls hold onto everything, and i mean EVERYTHING.   pictures from the 1st day you met until the day you broke up, birthday cards, ticket stubs, shirts of yours, gifts and so on.  its an endless list of items that are kept, everything that you once touched, is kept. 

what to do with all of that stuff?  i've witnessed a couple of my friends go through their things and its definitely a sight to see.  i think the one that stands out the most was a high school friend of my sisters, she kept a pair of jeans that had him on it (and when i say him, i mean HIM).  she didn't wash them because she didn't want IT to be cleaned off!  remind you of someone?  ya, it reminds me of monica lewinsky.  grosssss.  friend #2 (i will keep names out of this because it may get a little crazy) walked out of the apartment and sent me a text saying her man was in her bed and she had to get out of there.  i was told to tell him to leave, wash her sheets, and get all reminisce of him out of her room.  heartless!  friend #3 laid out all of his clothes that he left at our place and told us that we could pick and choose what we wanted to keep, got some great sweats!  friend #4 continued to sleep with her ex so his stuff kept on creepin back in!  and of course, some have burned everything.  i think the burning is the best, i've seen pictures, letters, journals, teddy bears, shirts, presents and so on, go up in flames.  burn baby burn.  i think the burning actually shows that the physical memory is gone.  its a very emotional feeling to see everything burn.

for me, i haven't done anything with my collections.  i burned a couple pictures one time but i was 16 and thats when ben harper "burn one down" was big and i felt cool to burn pictures from my disposable camera.  i have 3 boxes in my closet at home of my 3 boyfriends and god knows i'm already collecting stuff from you know who..  theres "love" letters from my 7-9th grade boyfriend about how he can't live without me and how we will be together forever, there are dried flowers from homecoming dances, state basketball ticket stubs and countless pictures.  i've been doing better with ted, however, every picture and every letter is on my hard drive so i wonder if i'll have to put that in a box when we're done?????

Here's to all the girls who light their exes on fire...